A Mother's Grief

Psalm 63: 3      Because your love is better than life, my lips will glorify you.

 

One of the saddest prayers that I have ever heard was voiced by a mother in her seventies, whose fifty year old son had just died of cancer. It occurred in the church sanctuary, during a special mid-week prayer time. The church was open in the morning, to allow people to come in and quietly talk to God. In the background, a tape was played, which included some favorite hymns and contemporary choruses. I happened to be in the sanctuary at the time, doing my own prayers and devotions.

 

One of the songs on the tape was an upbeat version of Psalm 63. Its repeated refrain was “because your love is better than life, my lips will glorify you.” In the middle of this song, the aged mother made a heart felt cry: “How can your love be better than life, Lord, when You have taken my son away from me?”

 

It was one of those holy moments when the reality of life confronts the reality of God. The woman’s heart was bleeding with grief, and her faith was being sorely tried. Each time the tape played the song’s refrain, she would ask that disturbing question. When the tape finished, the mother got up silently and left the church sorrowfully. I wanted to reach out and help, but something stopped me. It wasn’t the right time, and neither was it my place to answer a question directed to God.

 

The following Easter, our church held a Good Friday service. Usually during Holy Week, we held a Maundy Thursday service, but I thought it would be good if we tried something different. When I preached about the Cross that night and talked about God losing His Son to death, and feeling the grief of that separation, it was as if a light went on for the grieving mother. For the first time, since her son’s death, she could relate to God. He shared her heartbreak and knew the emptiness, hurt, and grief that she bore. God’s love was indeed better than life, not because it was holier or more perfect; God’s love was better than life because it was grounded in the reality of pain and suffering, loss and loneliness, sadness and grief.

 

Some of us may be carrying a grief that continues to hurt us and separates us from God. Perhaps if we remember that God understands our wounds because He experienced the same, it will draw us closer to Him, instead of keeping us at a distance.

 

Prayer:             Father God, when Jesus died on the Cross, You allowed Yourself to be hurt and wounded by the pain of separation, injustice, and suffering. During His death, You felt His loss and knew of the emptiness that grief can bring. You restored Him to life because You knew that pain and death, suffering and loss cannot be allowed to triumph in this world or the next. Help us to recognize that Your love is everlasting and that through faith in Christ, all things can be reconciled, restored, and resurrected. In Jesus’ Name, we pray. Amen.